LOVE ... one word which covers so much ...
- Carer's love / parental love to the child: the affection, the care and the support to grow.
Essential for children to grow into balanced adults. But not available to all.
The ones amongst us which got little of such love as children can still develop as balanced adults, it is just a little harder. Try this resource.
- Child's love to the parent: the affection, the innocence, the dependency, the trust.
- Spouse's love: a deep connection, a company you want to keep, great respect, solid trust, a commitment to share a journey with no end in sight, to tackle the obstacles, and enjoy the beautiful moments. Not an easy road, but a worthwhile road.
Such love does not happen on command and is not based on sexual urges.
Finding this love does not happen from the confines of a cave or the distractions of social media.
You have to create some opportunities for yourself - such as meeting with groups of interest to you -, then feel it from your heart. Experience it, live through it.
You will need to expose yourself a little. Just a little bit at a time to gauge and feel the trust and start engaging on the journey.
- love for friends, love for nature, love for books, love for ...
one word which covers so much ...
LOVE ... What it is not
- Love is NOT SEX : despite all attempts in movies and the media, love has nothing to do with sex.
You don't need to love to have sex either BUT be very wary of all its consequences.
If you are only trying to satisfy a primal urge, go solo!
It is definitely safe sex; it will never hurt anyone else; and won't give birth to another unwanted child either.
- Love is not necessarily unconditional between parents and children.
Despite the blood bond and society's push to make parents or children feel guilty when such situations arise, when such love is forever gone.
Behaviours within a family can be such that the trust can be deeply broken and at times the loving relationship cannot be restored. In extreme - but sadly enough - quite common cases of child abuse, or parental abuse, the love is unlikely to be restored.
To help with the challenges of raising a child in a challenging world. See the resource: The Silent Crisis as a good resource for good enough parenting and trust building between parents and children.
RESOURCES -> BOOKS
- The Silent Crisis Amanda Alexandria Robinson. ISBN: 978 0 9752341 3 6
- Heartwounds, Tian Dayton, Pub: HCI, 1997. ISBN: 978-1-55874-510-0
RESOURCES -> QUOTES
A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary. - Dorothy C. Fisher
Your children need your presence more than your presents. - Jesse Louis Jackson
It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but even more to stand up to your friends. - J.K. Rowling
Death leaves a heartache noone can heal. Love leaves a memory noone can steal. (Irish tombs)
We're forgiving of each other: we can have quite hearted discussions with each other but then the trust comes in
and we know that the discussion is not personal, but actually gets the correct outcome for the business
and for our clients. We're both very tolerant of each other's weakness
and respectful of each other's strengths and skills. - Unknown author
An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. - Gandhi
Il n'y a pas d'amour, il n'y a que des preuves d'amour. - Pierre Reverdy (1889-1960)
(French quote whose meaning can be conveyed as: Don't tell me you love me, show me you love me.)